Tuesday, October 12, 2004

How'd that happen? Joan Rivers rocked. She was really funny. Like, the funniest thing I've seen for months. She did go on about dry vaginas, Cher and plastic surgery but, oh, so much more besides. She's 71, she swears like fuck, she doesn't give a damn and she employs a six piece band just to play one tune right at the end of the show. She also gave the set away to the audience. The only bad thing was that she had huge chunks of script gaffered all around the edge of the stage. The scum in the stalls won't know that and will think she's got amazing memory for one so old. But us dress circle types know the truth. Joan's transport was pretty rubbish too - a Salford Van Hire wreck of an old van. We had a post-show snack from York's recently-opened Subway, which I devoured before penning my review. Being Subway virgins, we giggled like girls when the member of staff said "will that be a 6-incher or do you prefer a full foot?" and were intimidated by the amount of salad you get to select from. "We can pick more than three things? Wow. Pile on the jalapenos!" Luckily, we were alone in the shop. But the next time, watch out, we will be oozing ultra confidence and keen to demonstrate our freshly acquired sandwich knowledge to a shop full of hungry folk who are scared to order an Italian BMT 'cos they don't know what it is.

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