Tuesday, December 21, 2004

I have just spoken to a plumber. Strange people. "Can you come and have a look at the central heating?" went the shivery plea - we've grown tired of living in a cold storage warehouse. He's too busy. If he needs a part, "ooooh, might not happen mate". He told me he was going to finish for Christmas today but will try and get tomorrow. "Can't promise I'll get it sorted," he muttered, as if that instills confidence. If he does arrive I might keep him hostage and pimp him out to other people with gas boiler problems. They're slippery bastards, that's for sure. It's all that Swarfega they've lathered themselves in in an effort to shift all that flux stuck behind their grubby fingernails. A City & Guilds in brickwork gets you nowhere with central heating, unless I resort to using my expertise with a lump hammer and hit the thing. I should have misspent my youth playing with copper pipes and solder instead.

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