Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Press to play...

Interview today with the York Evening Press. Charles phoned me while I was shopping in The Range, a ridiculously over-stocked shop that sells everything from pig's ears to Jack Vettriano prints. I missed the call as I was busy buying a cutting mat and an A3 display book - in this game of Top Trumps craft related goods beat publicising a play. When I did finally talk to him it was a nice old chat but, given that we've known each other as theatre critics for a few years, a strange experience. I'd prepared for the interview by eating an 'Ultimate Breakfast' at British Home Stores, drinking Cappuccino in Starbucks and conducting surveillance on a security guard who sits at the entrance of low-budget emporium Primark. I noticed that he was zooming in on female customers' breasts, the odd carrier bag and generally having fun with his state-of-the-art CCTV system. Anyway, I managed to snap him in a rare moment of slacking, and keen observers of the picture on the left will notice that he's sending a text on his mobile. I reckon the message might be something about catching some lowlife scum attempting to dash off with £2 worth of polo shirts. I also bought a new suit today (a beige linen affair, not from Primark I'd like to stress) along with a pink shirt and a brown tie. A combo that might make me look a little bit like a Licorice Allsort. Anyway, retail therapy rocks. Tonight, we headed to Pave for a few shandys in the glorious Hull sunshine, a nice idea that was only ruined by the fact that the beer garden had been transformed into a creche for the very annoying children of adults with no parenting skills. Then it was home, to rewrite page 10 of the script, as I had left a character on stage with nowt to do. Keen not to miss The Apprentice, I just added the direction she stands upstage, juggling fire. Tomorrow we are being interviewed by Sky Sports and, over lunch with Ros Sullivan, the mighty might of my favourite regional newspaper, the Yorkshire Post.

1 comment:

Gordon said...

And what, pray tell, is wrong with Primark.

And, more to the point, how do you pronounce it? PRYmark or PREEmark?