Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Phlegm...

Today the streets have been further inundated with these football gangs. Two of the gangs very kindly suspended play to let me pass through via their pavement as I made my way to our lovely little corner shop. I half expected to feel the full force of someone's wayward Peter Crouch impersonation but, surprisingly, it didn't happen. Not only do the football gangs kick their £3 ball from Sports World at any and every available stationary object, they also spit a lot. I must have passed 20 of these urchins and at least 20 of them chose to take that exact moment as the cue to cough up all the phlegm that lurked at the back of their rotting gobs and send it hurtling at great speed towards the bit of pavement that they hadn't adhered their chewing gum to earlier. Charming. I was very pleased to get back to the safety of redrafting a play.

Listening: The Jam - A Town Called Malice


2 comments:

bazza27 said...

Todays sporting role models leave a lot to be desired, Rooney, Flintoft etc. Maybe you could bung the urchins a few complimentaries to Sully, let them see how sportsmen used to behave.

Stephen Newton said...

Now, now you risk sounding like an old fart. That said, when children started playing hide & seek on my close we asked about an Asbo. Sadly our Lib Dem councillors put the rights of the terrorists first.