Blokes...

I really do dislike Jeremy Clarkson and his Top Gear cohorts the Hamster and the scruffy one. But, oh dear, I have to concede that, together, they do make brilliant telly. Last night's polar jaunt, in which the Hamster travelled 450 miles from the Arctic to the magnetic North Pole via Inuit-powered sled while Clarkson and the scruffy one hopped in a souped-up, big-wheeled Toyota Hilux to make the same journey was a very satisfactory hour. Not least the training they did, which they failed to take seriously and, as a result, neither Clarkson nor the scruffy one were capable of putting up their tent. They were also met by the steely stare of a deadpan doctor who refused to see the funny side of this trio of televisual adventurers' terribly anachronistic and woefully blokeish humour whilst he attempted to explain the perils of a frozen penis. And it was wonderful to see Clarkson so seriously frustrated by his slow progress that, much to the distress of the scruffy one, he threw caution to the wind, put pedal to the metal and ripped off a petrol tank, scuppered a shock absorber and trashed a tyre worth £2,500. It was patently obvious quite early on that Clarkson would get to the North Pole first along with several support vehicles carrying no end of fancy picnic hampers and, well, he did. And once there he phoned the Hamster to go na-na-na-na-na down the line. The music they used was cool too and I've been listening to the tune non-stop for the last few hours as I downloaded it soon after the show's end - Clint Mansell's Lux Aeterna, in case you're wondering (which you'll probably be familiar with from either the superb Requiem For A Dream or the trailer for Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers).

Tags: Top Gear, Jeremy Clarkson