Once upon a time apprenticeships lasted seven years. Then along came Sir Alan...

The Apprentice line-up has been announced. There is an air of familiarity about the new bunch that Sir Alan has assembled: a single mother, a champion show-jumper, a self-confessed tomboy, a descendant of African royalty, the daughter of a millionaire, a woman who shares a Guinness World Record with her siblings for their impressive array of degrees, a former member of the Royal Artillery, a boxing ball-dancer, a software sales manager, a bank manager and a former debating champion who claims never to have lost an argument. It sounds like Extreme Monty Python. I already have a favourite - 24-year old Nicholas De Lacy Brown, a barrister, artist (in the vein of Salvador Dali with Crayola Crayons) and property developer. Poor lad, he's been telling the media that "from the moment I was born I knew I was destined for great things." Sadly, that's so obviously not going to be the case but at least he's on a reality TV show. I reckon Lee McQueen might be the first one to be sacked, given that he appears to be completely insane, describing himself as a cat and, according to The Times (no doubt via a BBC press release): "sometimes purring with perfection and at other times just biting".