Oldest son was telling me the other day that our newish librarian at the paper used to be his school librarian. She'd banned him from homework club - although he never went to homework club, so it was as useful as fining super-rich footie players a week's wages. Apparently, he "hadn't done anything". Of course, this is a lie but I didn't quiz him further. Now, though, I'm afraid to request press clippings in case I suffer a similar fate and get banned from the Christmas party I'm not bothering going to. Librarians are very useful people. I say this as I am currently basking in the additional hits that came my way after New Zealand's finest Dewy Decimal Classification System expert and international librarian of mystery, bizgirl, posted a nice hyperlink to me. Naturally, once people read this sub-standard nonsense they won't be back, but it was good while it lasted. Quite what bizgirl would think of me if she were aware that I'm avoiding heading to Hull's recently tarted up Central Library owing to the fines I've accrued in recent months I shudder to think. I think I also owe City of York libraries over £3. This is a day for coming clean. I would like to apologise to librarians everywhere, particularly Emma, who used to work at Hull College. Some loon commissioned us to make an induction video and, masquerading as art-house types on a mission to make librarians 'interesting' to the college population, we persuaded Emma to wear a very tight t-shirt and ride her mountain bike around a park for hours, while we filmed her from lots of unusual angles. I shall track down the footage and destroy it as soon as possible. Or sell it on ebay.
Script readings have been cancelled again. And life hurts.
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