Flicking around The Stage website I stumbled across an advert for a workshop that sounds quite interesting. For the mere sum of £145 and the price of a train ticket to London (which is, what, a couple of quid? I'll find out. I don't use public transport that often) I will be shown "How to write the best comedy sketches in the world ever!" In just one day! Naturally, it's an intensive course. But, boy, I can't wait to put the 10 tried and tested formulae for successful sketch writing into practice. This, my friends, is the future. Unless someone's just trying to make a few quid. The price goes down if I book early for the February 2006 course. But what price laughter? These secrets are worth thousands, surely. And, I dunno, maybe I could do the workshop and then sell the 10 tried and tested formulae on to other people. Imagine the amount of laughter that would fill the world then. No experience or sense of humour necessary.
What kind of world are we living in, I ponder, when there's a massive outpouring of Princess Diana-style grief for a dead race horse? Did Best Mate do lots of work for charity when he wasn't winning Cheltenham Gold Cups? Apparently, lest we forget the other 369, 370 horses are raced to death every year. Which is a nice thought, given that I've attended a few race meetings myself. I've punished myself, however, by losing loads of money by backing the sensible horses that run slowly so as not to strain their tickers. According to Animal Aid, "Heart attack is a common cause of death, as are a broken leg, neck or back. Some die on the racecourse, or during training or are destroyed because they are no longer commercially viable." No longer commercially viable? It's a good job this isn't applied to humans, I'd be long gone. Best Mate's owner Henrietta Knight has said that his loss left a "big vacuum". Maybe she could sell it at a car boot sale? Stable cleaning has obviously come on apace in recent years.
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